Cosmic love.

I do worry that I'm going to end up alone. Or worst, hating the person I end up with.

Because of the expectations I have for my future partner. Right now, I don't want to change the expectations because I do believe he's out there somewhere. It's not like they're unrealistic. I'm not hoping for a rich tall good looking stud who's a freak in bed. I just want someone.
oh shit I don't even know what I want in a man.

But hey what I am absolutely sure is I need a man who loves to suddenly break out into random songs and will dance along to the top hits of the 90's. (wait he sounds awfully gay) Or at least when I do it (and man do I do it always), even if he hates it, he doesn't make me stop and tolerates it like a champ.

Lately though, I've had the habit of being obsessed with guys I've only met twice or thrice and had conversations shorter than Kim Kardashian's wedding. I would worry that there's something wrong with me but I've asked around and this is completely normal. Apparently these days it's perfectly acceptable to fall in love with the made up idea of a person than actually getting to know that person and fall in love with them then. HAH

Another thing I'm pretty sure about is I don't want to go through the whole "hee hee um do you wanna be my gurlfrend" thing any more. I'm too old for that shit. I'm a shitty girlfriend anyway. You know when I listen to old people grandparents stories, the guy would see the girl for the first time and say to his parents "I'm going to marry that girl." and they do end up together for 60 years. There's none of these dating 10 different girls until you find the right one thing. Times have changed I know bla bla bla things don't always work out blabbity bla. I just think it's nice is all.


We just had dinner with our Ophthalmologist doctor and he said "The first moment I saw my wife's eyes, I fell in love with her." I just. What.
We d'awwed so hard I think the people who heard us grew new ovaries. I couldn't handle the amount of the sweetness in that sentence and just shed a tiny tear of hope that one day that'll happen to me too.