You lean in for your last kiss, and who in this world could ask me to resist.

Exams were brutal. Brutal and merciless. I am dumb as batshit, apparently. But that's okay. For now. Because now it's the holidays.

I am off to Ireland again. I don't mind going to the same place. Ireland is wonderful. Nature at its best and in all its glory. Also every time I listen to Mumford and Sons, I always think about the dirt roads beside the cliffs in Dingle. Dirt roads, kind of forsaken, forgotten, solitary. I always imagine walking on the dirt roads of Ireland's countryside. And I get that heavy anxious feeling in the pit of my stomach. I don't know I can't really explain it.

Solitary, that's the only word that sticks.

It's just an incredibly beautiful place, in my opinion. Feels more like home than Malaysia.

I think people should be more in love with the earth. Like the sun and the sea and the dirt. I'm in love with freakin' whales right now. They're amazing. They're huge, powerful, gentle and mysterious and they sing and they give birth to calves. God I can't even begin to explain the extent of my infatuation with whales right now. Once I make my own money, I am donating a shitload of them to helping whales.

I also think I would like to join Doctors Without Borders. Because I get to help people. I just want to help people, that's all I want to do. All day long.

I sound like a mega douche, all nature child and helping people and shit, but fuck you, I am seriously in love with whales. And I like helping people.

__________

I'm such a retard. I shouldn't get too attached to people, I know that, always have known that. People don't last. And yet, attached I am, and now I am sad.

It's just, things that shouldn't have ended, shouldn't end yet.

I miss you. I miss you like how the night would eventually miss the sun.

I miss you my friend. You asshole. I miss you.

Anyway, happy holidays fucktards.